Archive for the ‘ Humor ’ Category

Life Is Scary as a PR Cog

In honor of Halloween, here are 11 scary confessions about my life as a PR and marketing professional.

1 – I see more of my smart phone than I do of my children.

2 – I actually consider how the lady at the drive-thru window “messaged” the fact that they were out of fries.

3 – I spend almost as much time viewing the source code of a website as I do consuming the actual content.

4 – I see the likes of Tiger Woods sex scandals through the prism of crisis communications, and not for the sheer entertainment of it all.

5 – I get confused when I don’t see a “Share This” widget when leafing through the morning newspaper.

6 – I ask my wife to “send me a calendar invite” when discussing weekend plans.

7 – I advise my six-year-old son to “think about how that message will resonate with ALL of your core constituents” when he complains about bedtime.

8 – I view television ads as short films, not product pitches, and wish to meet the director and copywriting teams of the good ones.

9 – I miss the look of ink-stained fingers that are proof-positive you’ve just spent an hour with a newspaper.

10 – I actually proofread my Facebook status updates.

11 – I don’t mind anything about any of the above, except for #1.

Got any of your own?

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Two Words: Dogs Rule! (an ongoing series)

The Obama Blame Game, a la Spinal Tap

Why is it that every time I hear President Obama make reference to “George Bush” or “the last eight years” I immediately think of this?

(Scrub to 0:49 for the relevant bit.)

Just right. Obama has taken the stage, and is under the hilarious delusion that the crowd is still booing the opening act.

Enough already.

How Cool I Can Be

…if only in the eyes of my children:

Restroom Poets, Part IV

Mild content warning, so I’m putting the pictorial evidence after the jump.

“In the 20’s”

The roaring 20s, the era?

(For related posts relevant to my utter dismay and enchantment with bathroom graffiti, search “restroom poets” in the search box in the upper right.)

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The Difference Between Sales and Marketing

You can find life lessons and analogies in the most unexpected places sometimes.

I have this daily love-hate routine with my two-year-old daughter. Each evening when I get home, she is busy with whatever it is that’s urgent for a girl of her age, and I come in looking for some welcoming. She’s too busy for me, or maybe she now knows how the routine will end up and is just playing the part. She spurns my doting affection, protesting “Don’t TISS (kiss) me, dada! I don’t WIKE (like) it!” Of course, this only makes me persist all the more. And she resists, sometimes to the point of tantrum, and I keep on keeping on while my wife rolls her eyes. I must admit, I come on a bit strong. Eventually, I give up, and we go our separate ways. She lets me know she doesn’t like it, and I chuckle inside at how silly this daily tease is. As the evening wears on, however, she warms to me, and I become her hero and the object of her undying affection by bedtime.

The next day, the cycle starts all over again.

But not tonight. I was warned that she was under the weather and crabby, so I kept my distance upon arriving home. I could see from the “stink-eye” cast my way that she was fully prepared to put up fierce resistance when I entered the room, but I walked right past and gave her reprieve. I went upon my business and let her have her distance. After dinner, as she sit in a chair with her favorite blanket and her favorite scowl, I brushed by her and gave her a gentle squeeze on the foot before leaving the room.

But I didn’t get five feet before she stopped me. “Dada! I love….I love….I love when you touch gentle on my foot. And I love tisses. And I love when dada sit by me.”

As I sat by sick daughter, consoling a sick child and basking in the glory of what I had achieved, it dawned on me:

That, my friends, is the perfect illustration of the difference between sales and marketing.

SALES: Sometimes smothering, necessarily persistent…potentially off-putting.

MARKETING: “Hey. I’m here. And I’ll be here when you need me.”

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BONUS ANALOGIES

ADVERTISING: “Hey! Everyone needs me! If you’re reading this, you need me too!”

SOCIAL NETWORKING: “Hey. I’m here; you’re here. I might need you; you might need me. I might need someone you know, you might need someone I know. Let’s stay in touch.”

The K-Strass Interviews

Must watch: the fake yo-yo champion, “K-Strass,” making the rounds on local TV News. Here’s a taste, but check out the whole backstory here.

I confess to LOVING uncomfortable local TV interviews, especially fake interviews! These TV stations are getting punked, and the worst/best part is, they don’t even know it:

More here.